Big Brother Daniel

This is another long belated post.

One of the things that I am really thankful and grateful for is that Daniel adapted quite well to being a big brother. Have heard many instances of kids not taking well to younger siblings and this was something I was worried about. Perhaps it is the bigger age gap of 4 years or more likely due to the Lord’s grace.

Having a good and loving relationship with siblings is something which I appreciate in my family. Hence it is one of my desires for my kids to be able to enjoy this blessing too. And I believe it really starts when they are young. When I was expecting Ezra, we made it a point to get Daniel to pray for his baby brother in the womb everyday. We also included him when we were choosing a name for the baby. Ezra was Ivan’s choice. I had another choice name. We could not decide and so we asked Daniel which he preferred. Daniel chose Ezra (much to my disappointment!) and so we went with it! When the baby was born, we also gave him a present.

He took pretty well to Ezra from the start. Perhaps it also helped that the baby seemed to naturally like Daniel right from the start. Today, Daniel is quite confident that he is one of Ezra’s top favourite people! And I think he is quite right about that. Ezra seemed to adore Daniel even as a little babe. I was amazed at how Daniel was one of the few able to make the baby chuckle when the babe was a few months old. As Ezra grew older, his face always seems to lit up when Daniel is around, and he often wants go look for Daniel now that he is able to walk.

Of course they have their bad times too. Daniel hates it when Ezra ‘destroys’ whatever he is playing with and often gets quite mad when that happens. He is not the best baby sitter too – he is easily distracted and often more interested in whatever he is doing. But on the whole, I am thankful that there are more good times than bad and am happy that Daniel seems to be quite comfortable in his role as a big brother. Sometimes, he does try to share his stuff and food with his brother which is very heartwarming to see. He also loves kissing and hugging the baby goodnight.

Transiting from being only child to having to share attention and everything else may not be easy for a child to adapt to. As parents, we do try to manage this sensitively. But there are times where we fall into the trap of asking him to ‘give way’ to his didi and to be more ‘sensible’ when daddy and mummy are busy with didi. These could possibly cause a child to become resentful towards the younger sibling and I am glad that Daniel did not.

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